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“AS WE FORGIVE” “Forgive Us Our Sins AS WE FORGIVE OTHERS.” (In the same manner, How?) “AS we forgive”? (Is that what I’m asking? Asking for forgiveness the same way we forgive others, all the while caught up in the same sin?) Forgive us our sin as sin has gone out from us to infect our family, our community, our Nation and affects the whole world. There is nothing done alone in secret, if you know all about it. That which is done in the closet, effects everyone, even if it is said or done in private, was consensual, and could not even be mentioned in public. What goes on behind those closed eyelids, thoughts of the heart, exposed in who I AM! JUST LIKE WE FORGIVE? In the same way we forgive? Our manner, How. Give us the same forgiveness we have for others that you have given to us. May we have your kind of forgiveness. In your forgiving, may we have your forgiveness all the while we are forgiving. “Be kind one to another, tenderhearted, FORGIVING ONE ANOTHER, even AS GOD, for Christ’s sake has forgiven you.” (Eph.4:32) Christians are not perfect – just forgiven. (By God – why not by each other?) “Put on therefore , as elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, long suffering, forbearing on another, and FORGIVING EACH OTHER. If any man have a quarrel against any; even AS CHRIST FORGAVE YOU, SO ALSO DO YOU.” (Col.3:12,13) “AS” we forgive – Forgiveness: Keys to the Kingdom. (Thy Kingdom Come) The role of a King – to forgive subjects. Made to be Kings (a crown) A crown of life. (James 1:12) * Stars in your crown * Treasures in Heaven and in earthen vessels. (Thy Kingdom) “And I will give unto you the KEYS of the Kingdom of Heaven; and whatsoever you shall bind on earth shall be bound in Heaven; and whatsoever you shall loose on earth shall be loosed in Heaven.” (Mt.16:19; 18:18) What on earth is bound? (unbelief) “Still in their sins.” What is loosed is loosed. (forgiveness) “Sins forgiven” Set free, saved. “When Jesus saw their faith, He said unto the sick of palsy, son the sins be forgiven you. (can we say that too?) But there were certain of the scribes sitting there, and reasoning in their hearts, why does this man speak blasphemies? Who can forgive sins but God only? And immediately when Jesus perceived in His spirit that they reasoned within themselves, He said unto them, why reason thee things in your hearts? Whatever is it easier to say to the sick of palsy, your sins are forgiven you; or to say, arise take up your bed and walk? But that YOU may KNOW the Son of man has power on earth TO FORGIVE SINS, (He says to the sick of palsy), I say unto you arise, and take up your bed, and go your way to your house. And immediately he arose, took up his bed, and went forth before them all; insomuch that they were all amazed, and glorified God, saying, we never saw it in this fashion.” (Mk.2:5-12) “As We Forgive” Keys to the Kingdom “Your sins be forgiven you” (we can say that to believers too.) “Whosoever sins you remit, they are remitted unto them; and whosesoever sins you retain, they are retained.” (Jn.20:23) The Pope in Papal descendentcy is not the only one to have authority to forgive sins. No Scriptural basis for this. This was directed, not only to Peter, but to others also that were standing there. What does it mean? When the Gospel is shared – and you know that the “Hearer of the Word” (Faith comes by hearing the Word of God) has accepted it; you can say to him, “Your sins are forgiven” based on the Scriptural evidence of that persons confession of faith in Christ. (God said it, I believe it, that settles it for me). However, when the Gospel is clearly rejected, you would have to admit that person still retains his sin, when forgiveness is not accepted. “He that comes to God, believes that HE IS and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him.” (Heb.11:6) “AS WE FORGIVE” · A good reason to share the Gospel is to loose and bind; or remit or retain. Responsibility of John 3:36 is “He that Believes on the Son of God, has life. He that believes not, the wrath of God abides on him.” Hear Jesus’ Words – believes – has everlasting life – no condemnation – is passed from death to life. (Jn.5:24) When you share the Good News of the Gospel – 1. Christ died for our sin. (according to the scripture) 2. Buried (His death) 3. Rose again (eternal life) Key To The Kingdom – hear and believe – you can say – “Your sins are forgiven” (remitted, loosed) Reject the Gospel – they are “dead in trespasses and sins”, they retain their sins (bound) by not accepting the Gospel (forgiveness) Mark 11: verses 22. Have faith in God 23. Truth is – if you don’t doubt in your heart . . . 24. Whatever you ask in prayer, believe . . . 25. When you are praying, if you hold anything against anyone, FORGIVE HIM, so that your Father in Heaven may FORGIVE YOU your sins. How would you like to be forgiven like you forgive? How would you like it? To be forgiven? By you? Do you hold a grudge? Why? Are you as forgiving as our Lord is to you? Why not? Do you forgive yourself? What is it you’ve done in a moment that stills haunts you today? What do you say? I’m sorry, please forgive me. AS WE FORGIVE Our manner how! Love in action and attitude. Forgive the sinner, Their sin. (action, performance) Forgive the person. (performer, reaction, attitude) Love separates the sin from the sinner. (person) Love reacts to acts in forgiveness. Open Love (Agape’ love shows in action) by doing (vs. feeling or emotion) Saying “I love you” by our actions and reactions. (attitudes) Not to condemn, nor condone, but to love them, (object of God’s love) Do we see others as forgivable as God sees them? “God demonstrates His love for us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him has everlasting life.” (Jn.3:16) AS WE FORGIVE I Corinthians 13 “If I had the gift of . . . .” Love is very patient and kind, never jealous or envious, never boastful or proud, never haughty or rude. Love does not demand it’s own way. It is not irritable or touchy. It does not hold grudges and will hardly even notice when others do it wrong. It is never glad about injustice, but rejoices when wins out. If you love someone you will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. You will always believe in him, always expect the best of him, and always stand your ground in defending him. . . . . There are three things that remain – faith, hope and love – and the greatest of these is LOVE.” (Living Letters) Dad
December 1, 2006 at 12:27 pm |
God uses a significant analogy to describe a person who has been offended: “A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle” (Proverbs 18:19).
In the days of walled cities, there were only three ways to conquer the city. The first way was to storm the walls. This was a bloody ordeal and often ended in failure. The second method was to try to knock down the walls. This was a major operation and required huge engines of war. The third and most effective way was to watch for someone to leave a door open in the walls and to go through that door to conquer the city.
Finding the right time means asking: “When will this person be most open and responsive to my appeal for reconciliation?”
Generally speaking, when seeking reconciliation, it is best to make an appointment with the individual and meet face to face. When a personal meeting may create problems, make a phone call. Calling too early in the morning or too late at night would be inappropriate. It is also inadvisable to call during meal times or during times when you know the person would be very busy. Asking a close friend of the offended person for a suggestion of a good time to call could be the best approach.
The important thing is to make sure we do it. David certainly offended the entire family of Bathsheba when he committed adultery with her and arranged for the death of her husband. He probably had many opportunities to be reconciled to her family members; however, it appears that David did not seek reconciliation with Bathsheba’s grandfather, Ahithophel. (See II Samuel 11:3, 23:34.)
Ahithophel was David’s wisest and most trusted counselor, but David’s offense possibly caused him to grow bitter and wish for David’s death. When Absalom rebelled against David, Ahithophel gave Absalom precise counsel about how to destroy David. If Absalom would have followed that advice, he probably would have been successful in defeating David.
After preparing for restitution and wrestling with God for His blessing, we can anticipate God’s leading in the timing.
Since the command tells us to leave our gift at the altar and go our way to seek reconciliation, the best timing is the day in which God reminds us of the offense. In Psalms we read, “What man is he that desireth life, and loveth many days, that he may see good? … Seek peace, and pursue it” (Psalm 34:12, 14).
Has God reminded you of individuals whom you have offended? Let’s make today the day of reconciliation so that we can release the offended individuals from bitterness and experience the wonderful freedom of a clear conscience.
Through Christ our Lord,
Bill Gothard
February 6, 2007 at 3:45 pm |
The Power of Forgiveness in Marriage
Dr. Gary Smalley
Smalley Relationship Center
Laura was fed up with her husband and with all the upheaval in their lives. He often traveled out of town, and when he was home, he drank and made life miserable for her.
In her frustration, Laura came within an eyelash of throwing in the towel and filing for divorce, but her good friend Gayle talked her into going to see her pastor who she felt might be able to help. Even though Laura was reluctant at first, she was at the end of her rope. Against her better judgment, she made an appointment and went to see him.
For nearly forty minutes this wise pastor simply listened to her story. After Laura had shared her nonstop description of every one of her husband’s faults, she finally sat back with a loud “Humph.” Smugly she waited to hear an “Amen” from the pastor or at least a hearty confirmation that hers was the worst husband he had ever heard about.
At first the pastor didn’t say a word. Deeply engrossed in thought, he literally waited several minutes before he spoke. Finally he sat up, looked her in the eye, and said gently, “Laura, have you ever forgiven your husband for all his many faults?”
You could have heard a pin drop. Laura had not expected to receive this kind of advice. (No wonder his counseling is free, she thought.) Of course she had not forgiven her husband! He had never asked her to, and she wasn’t about to bring it up. He had caused her to suffer, and she wasn’t going to let him off the hook that easily.
“Laura, would you think about what I’ve said today, and would you promise to come back and see me next week?” As she grabbed her purse and headed for the door, she heard herself mutter something like “That would be fine, Pastor,” but she never thought she would be seeing him again. Yet something happened that week that began to change Laura’s perspective on her marriage. Something drew her back to this man’s office the next week.
In spite of telling herself repeatedly that she should forget what he said, Laura did a great deal of thinking. While it didn’t all make sense, it began to dawn on her that it wasn’t her husband who was on the hook — she was! He didn’t lose any sleep about his behavior; she was the one getting ulcers.
Laura was still confused and had a great many questions for the pastor the next time they met. However, God had already begun to do some miraculous things in Laura’s life. That afternoon, in the quietness of the pastor’s study, she surrendered her life to Christ. She also decided to give up her need for revenge, to forgive her husband for all he had done, and to learn to love him unconditionally.
Laura’s husband was a truck driver, and almost a week went by before he returned home. When he came into the house, he could have sworn he was at the wrong address. He couldn’t believe how peaceful things were. Just a week ago everything he did made his wife mad; now she was going out of her way to do things for him.
When this rowdy truck driver found out Laura’s change of heart had something to do with religion, he tossed her behavior aside as though it were another diet his wife had discovered. While it made things a lot nicer in the short run, soon her willpower would fade and they would be back at each other’s throats.
After five months, Laura’s husband made an appointment to see the same pastor she had seen. “You’ve got to tell me about what happened to Laura,” the truck driver said. “She’s changed so much. It’s made me realize what a rotten husband I’ve been these past years. Pastor, I have a drinking problem, and I need help with it.”
What made all the difference for this couple was that Laura, in spite of the fact that her husband didn’t “deserve” it, decided to keep her battery charged with the never-depleted source of God’s love and to take personal responsibility for her thoughts, feelings, and actions — and she chose to forgive her husband. For years she had made just the opposite decision. She had devalued him and cursed him to his face. She hated his occupation that took him out of town and filled his clothes with the smell of diesel fuel.
When Laura’s life was changed by God’s love, she was able, out of the overflow of His love, to attach high value to her husband and love him. Instead of riding him about getting another job, she found ways to build him up and encourage him. When once she had gone days without speaking to him when she was angry, now she told him her feelings, but without anger and hate. As a result, miraculous changes were able to take place in her husband and in her marriage.
No two marriages are exactly alike, but know that God’s call to forgiveness can free you and your spouse to take the next step towards a fulfilling and God-honoring marriage.
May 29, 2007 at 3:25 pm |
Consider the Cost of Not Forgiving!
A woman adamantly declared, “I will never forgive my father!” She had grown up with the acute awareness that her father favored her younger sister, and she kept a mental record of all the things that he had done or failed to do that had deeply hurt her. Now, her life seemed to be a never-ending series of conflicts, disappointments, failures, health problems, bad judgments, and personal frustrations. She blamed them all on her father, which only increased her bitterness.
When she told me about her hatred toward her father, I asked her if she had ever prayed the Lord’s Prayer. As she struggled to recall it, I began to quote, “Our Father which art in heaven …”
She responded, “Oh, yes! Many times!”
“Do you realize what you told God in that prayer?” I asked. She looked at me with a puzzled expression until I explained:
An unforgiving person who prays the Lord’s Prayer is asking God to not forgive him: “Forgive us our debts as [in the same way] we forgive our debtors” (Matthew 6:12; see also Matthew 6:15).
After giving the command to forgive offenders, Jesus told a parable that explained the consequences for anyone who does not forgive an offending brother. “Then his lord … said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt … Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee? And his lord was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that was due unto him. So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses” (Matthew 18:32–35).
When this woman realized the seriousness of refusing to forgive her offenders, she asked God to forgive her for her bitterness and was then able to fully forgive her father. As the burden of her bitterness was lifted, she experienced a new sense of peace and joy in her heart. Other changes began to take place in her life as well, including the ability to lose excess weight that she had unsuccessfully tried to lose for many years.
Unforgiveness is a trap that cannot be escaped apart from the power of God.
The seriousness of God’s warnings about unforgiveness should be a flashing red light in our minds, reminding and motivating us to forgive others. Let’s take some time right now to search our hearts for any unforgiving attitudes that we are holding on to and choose to fully forgive those who have offended us.
Through Christ our Lord,
Bill Gothard
June 1, 2007 at 9:20 am |
A bitter wife began explaining to me all of the hurts that she had received from her husband over many years. She had them memorized and was able to provide many examples of his insensitivity, unkindness, and selfishness! I interrupted her discourse with the question, “Have you forgiven your husband as Jesus commanded us to?” “Oh, yes!” she replied. “I have forgiven him many times, but he keeps hurting me!”
In her mind, any new offense was grounds for digging up all past offenses that she had “forgiven” and adding them to her arsenal. It was obvious that she did not understand the true nature of forgiveness. Jesus made it clear in this command that we must forgive from our hearts. (See Matthew 18:35.)
We may extend forgiveness with our lips, but until it comes from our hearts, it will not be full forgiveness.
Forgiveness is more than just saying the words “I forgive you.” It is fully releasing the offender from our judgment against him. If a new offense occurs, it should be treated as a new offense and not added to the “stack” of previous offenses. God’s example of full forgiveness is the model we should strive to follow: “As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he [God] removed our transgressions from us” (Psalm 103:12).
Because the wounds from an offense can often be deep and painful, giving verbal blessings is an extremely beneficial aspect of full forgiveness. Sincere blessings come from the heart, and it is the heart that rules the mind, emotions, and tongue. Jesus pointed out to the Pharisees that the mouth speaks out of the abundance of the heart. (See Matthew 12:34.)
When I told one hurting wife that she would never be free from her emotional wounds until she was able to verbally bless her husband, she looked at me in disbelief. She did not feel like blessing him; she wanted to punish him!
I explained to her that blessing an offender does not mean you are asking God to give him a happy and carefree life. Instead, it reflects a genuine desire to see good come to his life by asking God to develop in him the character qualities that he needs. If this woman’s husband had been mean and selfish, she could ask God to bless him with a spirit of kindness, compassion, and genuine love.
“Forgiveness is not an emotion … . Forgiveness is an act of the will, and the will can function regardless of the temperature of the heart.”—Corrie Ten Boom
Perhaps the most hurtful offenses are verbal assaults—especially false accusations from our loved ones and friends. James describes these verbal missiles as poison and as fire that is set ablaze from hell (see James 3:6–12). We cannot allow this verbal “venom” to go untreated. It will damage our fellowship with God and others through the bitterness that will take root in our lives.
If there is someone whom we are having trouble fully forgiving, let’s discern what character qualities he is lacking. Then, from our hearts, let’s ask God to bless them with the ability to develop these qualities and watch our attitudes toward them change as we invest in their lives.
Through Christ our Lord,
Bill Gothard
August 11, 2007 at 8:18 pm |
“STANDING ON THE PROMISES OF GOD”
Many have written us with a fear that perhaps they have “gone too far.” They have continually struggled with a besetting sin that seems to master them again and again. They wonder if they have lost their salvation, if God has given up on them, of if they were ever truly saved at all.
Please know this: If you are crying out to Him for forgiveness, it is only because He has given you the grace to do so–and He WILL answer your heart’s cry. If you were past the point of no return, you wouldn’t even care about the concept of forgiveness. It is only because you belong to the Lord that you are still seeking Him.
Jesus said in John 6:37, “All whom My Father has given (entrusted) to Me, will come to Me and I will most certainly not cast out–I will never, no never reject one of them who comes to Me” (Amplified).
If you are feeling weak, understand this about your beautiful Savior: “He does not crush the weak, or quench the smallest hope…” (Matthew 12:20, Living Bible).
God loves you and He is on your side to help you overcome sin. He is not against you. He is for you. Please refer to the above (and following) scriptures as often as you feel the need–as often as the devil would whisper lies of condemnation in your ear (Satan literally means “Accuser” and that is what he does best). Jesus stood against the devil with scripture and we should do the same thing! These promises are true and precious, for “God is not a man that He should lie” (Numbers 23:19). Even if you don’t “feel” forgiven, that is beside the point. God’s word is truer than our emotions.
All of us have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. That is why Jesus died for us in the first place! This is the most basic tenant of Christianity, yet it seems it is the primary lesson we all must learn again and again. God doesn’t love us because we are worthy. He loves us because He IS Love.
Hebrews 10:18-23, “Now where remission of these is, there is no more offering for sin. Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus, By a new and living way, which he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, his flesh; And having an high priest over the house of God; Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised.)
1 John 4:16-18 (NIV), “And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God and God in him. In this way love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgement, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”
Psalm 103: 8-13, “The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy. He will not always chide neither will he keep his anger for ever. He hath not dealt with us after our sins; nor rewarded us according to our iniquities. For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy toward them that fear him. As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us. Like as a father pitieth his children, so the LORD pitieth them that fear him.”
Psalm 34:18, “The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.”
Isaiah 44:22 (NIV), “I have swept away your offenses like a cloud, your sins like the morning mist. Return to me for I have redeemed you.”
Micah 7:19, “He will turn again, he will have compassion upon us; he will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea.”
Psalm 103:2-3, “Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits:Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases;”
Romans 10:11, “For the scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed.”
Jesus said that the one who is forgiven much will love much. We all need to be forgiven of much, but very few of us recognize it. If you recognize your sins and mourn deeply because of them, you are closer to true love than all the multitudes who are doing “just fine.”
However, just as there is a time to mourn for our sins, there is also a time to rejoice that we are truly forgiven and clothed in the very righteousness of Christ Himself. Once we have been forgiven, God wants us to walk free of the burden of guilt. That is why He assures us over and over in His word that He literally forgets our sins. I used to think preachers only made that up, until I saw it in the Bible. As if forgiveness were not enough, God also gives us the royal robes of holiness to wear. In Him, we are made righteous in Christ. If that is not something to rejoice about, nothing is! Praise God!!!
2 Corinthians 5:21, “For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.”
August 12, 2007 at 10:00 pm |
IT IS UTTERLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR LOVE TO BE DEFEATED
In all of God’s creation, one thing can absolutely never be defeated, and that is Love. Though it has been trivialized, mocked, perverted, ignored, and trampled on, True Love will eventually change the whole order and fabric of creation. It is impossible for this not to happen. God is Love, and God will never be defeated. Love cannot fail, but it will vanquish every foe that is set against it, of which unforgiveness, bitterness, hatred and pride are a part. These things will cease absolutely one day. But we can hasten that day and speed it’s coming, by applying the parameters of love to our lives now. If we do this, we wage spiritual war with the most powerful (and essentially only) weapon of spiritual warfare that there is.
We all love to talk about love in the abstract, but the depth of our commitment to it is revealed in our willingness and ability to forgive. It is the true measure of what sort of warrior we really are, in the kingdom of God. No matter what accusations the Enemy may make, forgiveness drowns them in the blood of Jesus, and turns the bullets of his words into butterflies. That is why forgiveness and walking in love cannot be mere options for the Christian. Either we do it, or we don’t. If we don’t, we deceive ourselves that we are Christ’s followers. If we want to follow Jesus then we must walk where He walked. We must forgive as He forgives and love as He loves. The simplicity of this gospel is the only thing that can and will transform us–and the world!
We’ve all heard these words, but let’s read them again from the Amplified Bible:
“Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy; it is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. It is not conceited–arrogant and inflated with pride; it is not rude (unmannerly), and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking ; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it–pays no attention to a suffered wrong. It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness , but rejoices when right and truth prevail. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best about every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances and it endures everything (without weakening). Love never fails–never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end” (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).
If you need to pray for forgiveness, here is a sample prayer to help you:
“Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for Your grace and mercy to me. Forgive me for my hardness of heart which I have displayed to others as well as You. Cleanse me of all self-absorption, self-pity, anger, hatred, bitterness, vengefulness, hopelessness and resentment. Help me to walk in Your love and to know Your love in my own heart. Though I don’t have it within me, I know that You have it within You and that you share your power with the weak. I confess my weakness and I look to You to make me strong in love, patience, longsuffering and humility. I look to all the testing of my faith as something good, for You know it will make me stronger in it. You are rich in mercy and will not chide and scold forever. I’m calling on You for forgiveness and the strength to believe Your Word and to follow it. Now, Lord, please send me the power of the Holy Spirit to strengthen me so I can follow through with all You’ve put in my heart. Help me not to stumble back into my old ways, but walk in the newness of life that You have promised those who are born again. Let my life be the very fragrance of grace to all I meet. Let me show others the kind of love that You have shown me. Thank you for your faithfulness Lord. I cling to your mercy and love You with all my heart.” In Jesus name I pray! Amen.